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Nov 2015
Dispensary Reviews:
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Dispensary & Marijuana Reviews

  • Reviewed 12/23/18

Green Love Potion

Nuevo Pheno Bueno

This newest generation of GLP is sublime--blissful, deep body medicine that is smoother than a kush (less "textured" feeling) and with more clarity and less dreaminess than a purp. This is one I want to have on hand at all times for romps either solo or partnered. True to its name, it heightens both imagination and sensuality. Then, after release, expect to nap. Oh, and it looks and smells as delicious and unique as its effects.

  • Reviewed 11/28/18

Double Black (SHAKE)(SALE)

Not for me

This is probably the best plant I've ever had for knocking myself unconscious, but I take no joy in using it because it has a dark, brooding vibe that I find unpleasant. It also tastes nasty and has very harsh smoke, both of which make it hard to consume enough to get where I want to be--Sleepytown USA. I suppose baking with it or vaping oil made from it could work, but then there's that dark vibe...To look on the bright side, it could maybe be good for people who are into stoner metal or something? Anyhow, enough said---it's not my cup of tea.

  • Reviewed 10/18/18

Gelato Cake

Impeccable Purple

I love this cannabis. Delicious, beautiful and complex---the effect is colorful and imaginatively stimulating but also sedating and euphoric. And INTENSE---I've gotten an astonishing number of highs out of a gram that looked like a half-gram (the nugs are very dense). Strains like Wedding Cake and Gelato and Sunset Sherbet are all related and have similar effects and flavors and it's no wonder they are all so popular. This is one of those and it's a damn good one.

  • Reviewed 8/5/18

Kashmir Gold (SALE)

Pain Medicine...Or Psychedelic Sacrament?

I've had mixed results with this medicine, and I'm starting to realize that the key here is dosing yourself properly. Once the cannabinoid level in your system gets to where it needs to be (and there are cannabinoids galore in this sacred blossom), there's a chance you might experience the transcendent effects I achieved, which was like the rolling orgasm of Satan's own narcotics crossed with the presence of the Holy Spirit in all her resplendent array. This is what I imagine those great Colombian landraces like punto roja must be like, with the sun bringing everything out of a plant with the whole alphabetical array of THCs and CBDs locked into its code in equal measures. Serious healing.

Another option, of course, is to use the flower in moderation--a few pulls from a vape every few hours--to keep yourself pain-free and in decent spirits but still clear-headed throughout your busy day.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 8/5/18 at 4:11 PM Pacific

Lemon Meringue (SHAKE)

The most functional?

This might be the most effective "functional" strain for knocking out pain, lethargy, anxiety and crippling self-doubt--while maintaining a clear head and energy--of any I've tried. The 2:1 THC:CBD balance is comparable to Citrus Tango, a favorite daytime CBD strain, compared to which the effect of these flowers is dreamier and less penetrating/thoughtful. I notice none of that anxious edge that mixed CBD strains can sometimes have in low doses (although I just had a pint of ale so results could vary depending on current body chemistry) and of course flavor/cure/manicure is impeccable. It's hard to wrap my head around the idea that this is a low-cost line, as the flowers are as good as or better than the top-shelf of anyone else. I'm tempted to warn you of a certain lack of potency, but that's the tradeoff with high-CBD strains like this. It is what it is. If you want a potent, speedy sativa from Mark Lewis try the wi fi nigerian. This one is less for doing projects and more for functioning at a social event with good positive energy and the ability to think clearly.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 8/5/18 at 4:50 PM Pacific

Lemon Wedding Cake(SHAKE)


Warm Comfort

This flower offers a hug of soft forgiveness right on the recalcitrant ol' dopamine receptors, which is just what the doctor ordered--my anxiety is calmed to a point where I can reflect without fear. I'm not sure why this has been rated as a "2" for strength--I rolled .3 grams of it in a RAW paper and smoked maybe half of that amount and I am thoroughly baked---my body is pillowy from the CBD and it feels like a refreshing wind is blowing through my head. What a great strain of cannabis! And I should also mention that I'm pretty much indifferent to flavor--unless it truly tastes like dog shit like Double Black, I'm only interested in the effect--but I did notice that this bud is extremely tasty, with sweet and zesty smoke and no bitterness at all.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 8/4/18 at 6:00 PM Pacific

  • Reviewed 7/30/18

Dispensary Review:

Capital City Care

So convenient, Best deals in DC

This place is so convenient for me--right by my house, and I've never seen another person in there. If you had to choose one this might be it for me, although I don't think they'd be doing these insane BOGO sales if that were the case...

Glassy Focus

First of all, my sample looked nothing at all like the chocolate-raspberry number pictured above; it was more of a silver-pine-purple number, very tight and dense. The high was very focused and functional, but with a zesty euphoria as well. I noticed no anxiety or edge. Kind of like a haze with all the haze bred out. Not really a favorite of mine--there's nothing weird or woolly it, but it certainly has its uses to an amateur apothecary's shelves--I can't think of a better strain for ADD, and I think it would be good for head and neck pains as well.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 8/4/18 at 5:49 PM Pacific

Super Silver Haze- BOGO

Capital City Care

Grounded Euphoria

So if you look at the genetics of this varietal it looks like Jack Herer with an elevated haze presence, which strikes me as a good way to approach thinking about her. She's a more exhilarating and even slightly more creatively inspiring varietal than Jack, but there's less lucidity ("hazier") and a steep haze crash instead of Jack's more forgiving slope. Another point of comparison might be Amnesia Haze, a personal favorite. SSH offers maybe just slightly less of a boost than Amnesia Haze, which is probably a trade-off you make for that nice comforting body feeling from the Northern Lights, and which also gives it a somewhat more functional effect. Definitely one of my all-time favorites, a true classic, and the gram flower I received from Cap City (for ten bucks!) was potent, if a bit dry. 4.5 stars.

  • Reviewed 7/30/18

Dispensary Review:

Takoma Wellness Center


All of the dispensaries in our city have something unique to offer, but Takoma Wellness is unquestionably my favorite. I thought about this the last time I went there--when I come out of this dispensary I always feel like I got what I need, not just what was on sale that day or what I went in there to buy, but I got just the kind of medicine my body is asking for right now because this place puts me in the right frame of mind to make those choices.

Maybe it's because the Kahns and their story are so humane and inspiring, or because this was my "home" dispensary back in the day, but to me this place is miraculous--it manages to be the largest, most efficient dispensary, and also the warmest and most loving.

Mazel Tov and Happy Fifth Anniversary!

  • Reviewed 2/18/16

Green Punch (Shake)

Gorgeous Flower

I think that this is the prettiest, tastiest medicine available. Dark green calyx sparkles with crystals and vivid red pistils. Vapor tastes like delicious tropical fruit--pineapple, guava, mango. Green Punch is not all that potent but her effects accumulate nicely. The effects are a bit spacey in the head for me, and trippy too, but the real draw here is the body buzz/awareness which would be great for yoga or hiking.

  • Reviewed 2/8/16

Lost Coast Hashplant SALE

Rich Sensations, Golden Slumbers

When I tried Trainwreck I really didn't like it---that 30-minute racey/trippy/paranoid sativa trip and then CRASH into a slow, lumbering indica stone isn't what my system usually craves. But combined with the Hashplant (which must be one heck of a sticky sensation) the sativa effect of the Trainwreck contributes just a soupcon of exhilaration to the most delicious body relaxation. In other words, they go together splendidly. It reminds me of Pineapple Express (another trainwreck cross, now that I think of it) in that it combines anxiolytic with euphoric effects, but LCH employs a more robust and colorful indica effect. It's doesn't smell like much but I think this is one of the most potent strains I've tried, up there with Medijuana and Pinetrak for sheer effect-to-dollar ratio. Try a crumb and call me in the morning.

  • Reviewed 2/2/16

Blueberry Headband SALE!

Least favorite

I am not a fan of any of the blueberry crosses I have tried. They all leave me thinking "I like this feeling but it feels restrained, watered down." Headband is a very strong, heady cannabis that puts you right into an intense train of thought. Great for ADD or just wailing on your vintage STRAT. The blueberry dials that intensity back, and adds nothing discernible to me. I don't like Blue Cheese, Blue Dream, or Berry OG as much as I like what they were before they were mixed with blueberry. HARRUMPH!

Last edited by trichomeomom on 2/1/16 at 4:41 PM Pacific

The Overnight Scenario

heavy body dreamy mind

This relaxes the muscles and skeleton thoroughly while sending the mind to a slowed-down sharp-angled realm of the weird. Has that really wonderful complex aroma that district growers' buds have---lemongrass, hay, cheese---with medium-density frosted light calyxes and a scattering of half pale orange, half dark orange pistils and near-black sugar leaves composing a scattering of six or seven different-sized buds I received as a gram. It feels like more of a novelty to me than an everyday smoke, but actually quite useful for bad pain, if you want to medicate the pain but keep your mind relatively alert. If you like this you might want to try Lost Coast Hashplant and Purple Trainwreck.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 2/9/16 at 11:04 AM Pacific

Ugly Old Goat Is Gooood Dope

This gnarly, fuzzy flower looks like lichen on a log in a deep appalachian glen and smells like grass, turmeric and basil. It is great imagination medicine---vivid colors, twisted thoughts---but without the edginess of a lot of the more aggressively psychoactive strains. The comedown is nuanced and gradual. Certainly a contender for GODD (greatest of DC's dispensaries) if not GOAT.

  • Reviewed 2/1/16

Sour Diesel #4

Pure Happiness

I can see why this is so popular! It comes on in a colorful wave of calm euphoria that doesn't overwhelm the mind, so it's great for deep thinking and creative endeavors as well as depression and pain. It lasts a good long time and the comedown is a gentle slope with very little fuzziness. I hope this becomes a permanent staple of the menus in DC because it is marvelous.

  • Reviewed 1/31/16

Old Amsterdam

Kinfolk Dispensary

Up Your Game Metro Wellness

This is definitely an indica. It was listed as an Indica on Takoma's site when they had it and sure enough I am couchlocking hard in the middle of the day on this stuff my friend assured me was great daytime medicine.

  • Reviewed 1/31/16

Night Terror OG (SHAKE)

Doom Metal

This reminds me of the herb a friend of mine grew. He asked friends for seeds of the heaviest, most couch-locking go-to-sleep indica they could find. We called it "doom metal" for the deep, slow, crunchy groove it laid down. This Night (Terror) OG is way stronger and less harsh than his, though I will say in terms of value medijuana might be the way to go if you are medicating pain. It's smoother, not as grip-like in its intensity, and more focused on the head than the body (in my experience).

Last edited by trichomeomom on 1/30/16 at 10:00 PM Pacific

MediHaze V2 (SHAKE)

Medical Lucidity

This is a very medical strain. At initial onset the mind becomes clear, but without euphoria or exhilaration. Once the medicine settles in, it's easy to get sleepy. Good medicine for people who are medicating a bodily ailment and who want or need to remain mentally and emotionally unchanged by the herb they are using.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 1/30/16 at 8:17 PM Pacific

  • Reviewed 12/19/15

Green Love Potion (Shake SALE)

Throbbing Color

It may just be the power of suggestion, but the first hour and a half or so under the influence of this flower, and I have distinctly felt the blood stir in my nethers several times. Could be good for lovin'? After the early psychoactivity and positive energy the Love Potion drops you off at sleepytown USA. Hon Shew my friends.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 12/18/15 at 6:18 PM Pacific

Blue Cheese (SALE)

Middling Indica

This stuff is very relaxing and feels nice but, for this old brain, it's just a little bit too bland. I got four or five smokes out of a half-gram, so it's plenty strong, but all I ever really achieved was a narcotic effect. There's nothing creative or uplifting about it, and I prefer a bit more psychoactivity from an Indica (GDP is my favorite).

  • Reviewed 12/10/15

TRIM: Granddaddy Purple (GDP)


Aaaah, warm medicine in all my cracks and crannies! These tiny little buds of GDP warm up my nervous system to a lovely temperature. I feel relaxed, happy, like I'm taking a bath in warm warm honey. Fills in all my interstices. There is also a focused psychoactivity with lots of color. Great for watching a movie, worshipping Onan, napping.

  • Reviewed 12/3/15

Subtle, lucid, poised

This is an interesting medicine. First of all, it's exclusive to DC (as far as I can tell from the internet) AND it comes from landrace genetics uniquely combined to harmonize enlightening and energizing traits into one beautifully stated herb. I smoke it and think "Neil Young bought a pound of Acapulco Gold with record company money before recording 'After the Gold Rush.' Pinetrak contains landrace genetics from Mexican landrace seeds from the 60s. I bet he was feeling this feeling when he recorded that album." It's upbeat, creative, and harmonized so well, like Jack Herer but less spiritual and more "can-do." Try a bowl with your breakfast berries!

Last edited by trichomeomom on 12/3/15 at 1:05 PM Pacific

Energized, Creative, Happy

What a nice haze! Hazes are lovely medicines. They elevate the mind to a more energized state. They say Amnesia Haze is just the same as Super Silver Haze, in which case hats off to them both. It is excellent medicine. Try any haze you can lay your hands on. Then stroke the frame of the big brass gong.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 12/3/15 at 1:09 PM Pacific


I took a few crumbs of this medicine from a small water pipe and was out on the couch for the rest of the night. Originally called "Herijuana," this is strong medicine to get you good and stoned. But unlike other indica-dominant strains, Medijuana's Indica sag seems to settle right between the eyeballs, and from there to radiate out into the arms. This would be the best strain for times when you have a headache and you just want to sleep. Not much aesthetic pleasure with this one but it says right there in the name: MEDIjuana. Get your kicks elsewhere mister.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 2/1/16 at 1:39 PM Pacific

  • Reviewed 11/29/15

Party Joint

This would be the perfect doob to pass around a raging party [of duly licensed Washington DC medical marijuana patients]. I am not in fact the owner of one of these beauties but man do I covet an entire wrapped gram of this marvelous strain for less than a double sawbuck. I have sampled the flower inside and it put me into a dreamy, mellow euphoria along the lines of GDP but with perhaps a shade more well-being and a shade less sheer pleasure. I wish Takoma had some of the buds--thickly blanketed in a rich fuzz of pale orange pistils, it is truly comely medicine.

  • Reviewed 11/20/15


Refined Medicine

Astonishingly potent and fast-acting, it strikes an elegant balance between psychedelic exhilaration and calm well-being. Well-tooled and crafted, it reminds me of Japanese Scotch the way it creates angles in my mind. Like the instrument panel of a luxury car.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 2/17/16 at 10:26 PM Pacific

That nice, diamond-like light

Right between the eyes. Call this a 4.5 for a powerful herbal stimulant that would be useful for homework, sex, or band practice. I am a big fan of hazes and this one is clean and strong. Sheer gushing energy euphoria for a while then a crash that you can turn around with a good walk or some stereo time. Meanwhile get some brainstorming done when your mind is blessed with this laser awakening.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 11/20/15 at 10:57 AM Pacific

  • Reviewed 11/19/15

Spirit Plant

This is a spiritual, uplifting delight from start to finish. There is an immediate feeling of harmony and of the beauty of the world and the pleasure of inhabiting one's own conscious mind that makes it my favorite strain for art or nature. It's also incredibly easy coming down and it leaves you energetic and clear-headed.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 11/19/15 at 3:09 PM Pacific

BerryO (SALE!)

Relaxing, mellow, soothing

This is a nice mellow smoke with a unique, roasted-protein kind of flavor. A good plant to bring out for your friends who don't smoke very often because its purple color and Southeast Asian heritage are interesting to talk about and it's not all that strong or heady or stony. Some of its effects are imprecise and in this it reminds me of mid-grade, but I also experience nostalgia when I have that feeling (smoked a lot of middies over the years). I agree with the criticisms that have been voiced about its potency but I would add that it's a good one to buy a half-gram of just to keep around for the times you have a group of novice smokers over. Takoma gives you a fat half-gram, too, probably because it's not that popular.

Last edited by trichomeomom on 11/19/15 at 3:29 PM Pacific

Slight Disappointment

I was really looking forward to trying this strain because of experienced westcoaster's effusive review and it's sad but I was a bit let down. Don't get me wrong, it's a nice strain that does what a sativa is supposed to do, but there was something about the way it slowed my thoughts down that I didn't like. It's a very cerebral and pain-relieving (and pleasure-producing) high, so if you have a headache or toothache this would certainly help. But because it isn't clear-headed at all (it's more like a film of pleasure over your thoughts) I prefer Amnesia Haze or Shackzilla for their stimulating effects and energy. This one could be good for the second smoke of the day, if the first has a steep "crash" effect after an hour or so that leaves your mind tired and achy. It'll rub that pain right out and I definitely understand experienced westcoaster's remark that this strain has a "wonderful mood".

Last edited by trichomeomom on 12/3/15 at 2:27 PM Pacific

SALE: Pineapple Express (Shake)

Dreamy, Happy, Secure

Long-lasting and very pleasant, this did leave me with a somewhat addled head after a few hours. I toked some Amnesia Haze from a water pipe and it restored some of my mental edge for an hour or so, then it was on to indica for the rest of the evening.

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